


feelings you can only understand beneath the stars (prequel)

by iloveyourrosecheek



Series: Not so Lonely Stars [5]
Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Car rides, Coming Out, Coming of Age, Cuddling, Fluff, Growing Up, Intimate touching, M/M, Mild Angst, Minor LGBTQ+ themes, lots of banter, over dramatic, soft, spicy cuddling, still hella soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:20:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27520651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iloveyourrosecheek/pseuds/iloveyourrosecheek
Summary: No one denied feelings like Yeonjun, he did it so well it could be considered an extreme sport. But Beomgyu was always there to cause problems, and apparently that didn't stop at stealing his nice pens. Apparently it stopped somewhere after touching him a little to intimately for friends.Or Yeonjun and Beomgyu hang out by themselves for once.
Relationships: Choi Beomgyu/Choi Yeonjun
Series: Not so Lonely Stars [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1981996
Comments: 18
Kudos: 48





	feelings you can only understand beneath the stars (prequel)

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, I really missed these boys and am glad to be back to them
> 
> **This work is part of a series and I would really like you to read it first!**

Making friends had never been something that Yeonjun considered hard for himself. But, there comes a point in someone's lifetime where they start to look around and question who exactly they are as a person. Depending on what they currently act like, they might be happy with what they have; no need for self exploration, content with the place they are. These people may even possess a sense of fear in relation to change. In simpler terms, growing up can be hard. 

For himself, Yeonjun thinks anyone else in his position would have been perfectly fine staying as they are. Maybe not a stereotypical popular jock, but close enough to it. He was good at sports, had a lot of ‘friends’ who were good at sports, and was fairly decent in his school subjects. A combination that would help to put him pretty high on the middle school social hierarchy. 

He couldn’t seem to find pleasure in this situation, no matter how hard he tried. A question. What happens when the mold that everyone has decided you fit in doesn’t quite fit anymore? The look of surprise on people’s faces when they find out he dances would always give a sick sort of feeling. They weren’t mean nor nice, almost confused. 

Redefining himself may have started with embracing his interests but there was a deeper development. The fluttery feeling he sometimes got in his chest when touching other boys probably should’ve been an indication that he wasn’t _quite_ straight. The realization wasn’t quite as dramatic as he was waiting for it to be. The only thought he really had was, _Oh_. Not quite knowing what to do, or what it meant. It was more of a sinking feeling in his stomach, a problem waiting to occur.

Coming out was awkward, more awkward than he was expecting. The first thing he noticed is that people didn’t seem to understand what it meant for him to be bi. Over the years he would learn just how common the phrase “Are you sure you aren’t just gay?” was. He also learned how easy it is to look over how terrible people can be. He gained this knowledge through a few lost friends.

Through this process Yeonjun met Soobin. A kid in his science class that was growing into his long limbs, comparable to a baby giraffe. It was endearing in a manner Yeonjun had never experienced towards another person before, having not been very close with any of the “clique” friends. Best friend is a title that he only began to comprehend upon meeting Soobin, love runs a little deeper than one might think. 

Being around people who go through the same struggles as you brings a feeling of comfort similar to a childhood stuffed animal. Having someone who was lgbtq+ around gave him a sense of relatability, the world feeling a little less “othering” than before. 

After Soobin, Yeonjun met the bane of his existence freshman year, Choi Beomgyu. The boy seemed to take it as his personal mission to annoy Yeonjun to death. The worst part of it all is that Yeonjun loved it. This marked his first crush on another boy that he actually had a chance with, even if he didn’t know it himself then.

By junior year Yeonjun had built himself a small friend group of about three people. Kai being a younger boy shyly carrying a small pride pin attached to his bag. Soobin had begged persistently for them to adopt him. 

Over the years the boys have built up a routine, on Saturday nights they go over to Beomgyu’s place to play video games and eat copious amounts of chicken nuggets until they pass out at 4 am. That was the plan for this Saturday, they were going to play a weird wii game they found online and sleep on the couch. Except, Soobin and Kai couldn’t make it. 

Kai had a family party to attend and Soobin was swamped with homework for his ap psych class. Yeonjun was prepared to just cancel the weekly hang out, but seeing the disappointed look on Beomgyu’s face caused any thoughts he had on this to disappear and immediately agree to still come over.

Yeonjun and Beomgyu hanging out was not a new occurrence, not new at all. It wasn’t even new for them to be hanging out alone, albeit not as common. So, why was Yeonjun so nervous? Maybe it was because he was staying the night, with just him and Beomgyu. But, it's not like that was odd? Or at least it shouldn’t be considered as such?

Too many questions for such a normal situation ran through Yeonjun’s mind as he waited outside on Beomgyu’s porch.

“Yeonjunnie!” Beomgyu’s sing-songing his words in a high pitched mocking tone, Yeonjun ignores why he was worried in favor of playfully shoving the smaller boy. He genuinely forgets that he was even hesitant about coming over in the first place. They lay together on the couch in the basement, Beomgyu showing him random reddit posts he thought Yeonjun would find funny, he did in fact find them funny.

If he bothered to ponder over how easy spending time with Beomgyu was, or how much the other seemed to understand him, even the little things, he might’ve had enough sense to notice that the feelings that were knit between them were deeper than a simple conversating, running beneath the skin in ways that would become permanent. Connections that would never go away, even if they’re physically separate from each other. 

Beomgyu’s eyes were cute and wide every time he asked Yeonjun a question.

“What do you wanna do?” 

“Do you wanna watch a movie? 

“What movie do you wanna watch?” 

“Do you want food?”

The repetitiveness of Beomgyu’s words should have gotten annoying, that was the intent behind them, but for some reason Yeonjun just couldn’t find them as such. For appearances sake he would groan and complain about Beomgyu’s incessant whining, because liking even the worst traits of a person was falling far too deep into a crush he only semi-consciously acknowledged.

The hours passed quite quickly, between playing games (which quickly devolved into no longer trying to win but just trying to fuck each other over) and arguing over what they should watch there weren’t really any points where they weren’t focused on each other.

That brought them to the decision of what food they would be getting. If they didn’t decide soon most places would end up closing and they’d have to settle for buying a bunch of snacks from the 24 hour convenience store.

“I want pad thai!”

“But they don’t deliver!”

The pair had been at the same argument for what felt like a ridiculously long time. In reality it was only a few minutes but there’s only so many ways you can vary the same points.

“Look, please, we can just drive, I’ll even pay for all of it, pretty please?” Beomgyu had progressed far past the point of whining and was currently giving him the biggest puppy dog eyes one could manage. Yeonjun was a sucker, a pushover, and most of all weak, pushing himself up with a heavy sigh as he went to grab his car keys. Beomgyu’s cheers of joy might have made going out again worth it. 

The sun had set outside a while ago, the world draped in a blue toned darkness. Beomgyu’s face was lit up by his phone, stealing the aux that he himself had bought an adapter for just so he could play music in Yeonjun’s old car. He probably paid too much attention to the way Beomgyu’s nose scrunched up as he scrolled through songs for someone driving, eventually settling on a random song off a playlist Yeonjun was pretty sure was one of his. 

“When you finally take your driver’s test soon you’ll be able to go places on your own.”

“Why would I do that when I have you?” Beomgyu says it like a question, but his lips are curled into a mischievous smile. Eyes playful, the way they look when he knows Yeonjun’s about to go after him.

“You’re a fucking brat.”

“You love me.”

Yeonjun pushes away a thought of _“Yeah I actually do.”_ in favor of laughing at what they both so obviously know was a statement and not a question. The street lights periodically brightened the inside of the car, Beomgyu softly singing along to the song that was playing. The moment felt, suspended, like he could sit in it forever. More of a still set than a scene, if he didnt move, maybe time wouldn’t pass, maybe he didn’t want it too. 

But it does, no matter how much he or anyone else wishes it not to, pulling up on the curb outside the restaurant. Beomgyu gets up excitedly, running in to grab the greatly desired food. The neon open sign illuminates his face in a hopelessly pretty way, there was simplicity in the sight before Yeonjun, yet he still wanted so badly to frame it. 

The ride back was just a fight over whether or not Beomgyu should be allowed to eat in his car. 

“It’s shit anyways it's not like it _matters_!” Beomgyu pointed out a fact that while objectively true made Yeonjun scowl. His car may be on its third owner, and may have one too many scratches but it was still _his_ car.

“Yeah, but the seats aren’t stained and I would like to keep it that way,” He reiterated, disagreements between them usually just led to some variation of “no” “yes “no” “yes” “no”. 

“I would be careful!” Beomgyu complained.

“No you wouldn’t.”

Yeonjun can admit though, that he was also very hungry. As much as Beomgyu whined about wanting food, Yeonjun ended up finishing his as well. Beomgyu giggled as Yeonjun stuffed his cheeks with noodles, mouth forming a pout as he tried to give his opinion on what Studio Ghibli movie he thought was the best.

They ended up watching Kiki’s Delivery Service, deciding to watch Spirited Away when Soobin and Kai would be there. 

Beomgyu was pressed up against his side, warm and soft. It took all of Yeonjun’s self control not to nuzzle his face into the other’s hair. They all cuddled generally, but that felt a little too much like crossing a line he’s pretty sure he set himself. 

Yeonjun cooed softly, it was closer to the end of the movie and Beomgyu’s eyes were slowly closing, before blinking back open. His movements were sluggish, clearly exhausted.

“You want me to go grab the comforter so we can sleep?”

“It’s just us, we can probably both fit in my bed, it’ll be more comfortable,” Beomgyu loosely laced his fingers through Yeonjun’s own, pulling as he got up.

“O-ok.”

Beomgyu’s bed was definitely a lot more comfortable than the couch, physically, not mentally, mentally Yeonjun was freaking out. Moonlight was streaming through the windows, Beomgyu barely visible. Yeonjun could feel their legs brush against each other as he got under the covers. Pushing down all the thoughts he refused to have about a friend, especially while sharing a bed with said friend, he focuses on the way Beomgyu’s eyelashes hit his cheeks (which admittedly isn’t much better). 

The situation in and of itself was actually nice, super nice. The physical affection was calming, like it’s own lullaby for just the two of them. Yeonjun rolled over, burying his face in the pillow. He focused on keeping his breathing even. This probably would’ve worked out if Beomgyu didn’t run his fingers over the edge of Yeonjun’s shirt. His hand was surprisingly warm as it touched bare skin, sliding up over Yeonjun’s spine, settling on his shoulder blade.

“You’re really pretty,” Beomgyu’s voice was deeper when he whispered. Yeonjun shivered. Beomgyu had moved so that his nose was pressed against the back of Yeonjun’s neck. “Can I touch?”

“You’re already touching.”

“Can I continue?”

Yeonjun hesitated, if only for a moment.

“Yes,” Embarrassingly enough, he could already feel his face heating up. Red rushing to his cheeks, the tips of his ears, his neck. Beomgyu’s hand had moved to his waist, tracing the light curve. Beomgyu continued to touch him, a little too gently, a little too long, to pass as _friendly_. He was getting even hotter, flushing blotchy and ruddy. 

“I can see how much you’re blushing even if you’re turned away from me,” Beomgyu was pouting, “I wanna see your face.”

Yeonjun, mistakenly, obliged. Turning an even deeper pink as Beomgyu let out a breathless “Beautiful”.

“You like compliments huh, lucky for you I am on no shortage of things to say,” Beomgyu pushes his bangs back, exposing his forehead. “I wanna watch you blush all the time, you look so gorgeous, my kitten.”

Yeonjun felt like he physically could not handle this anymore. 

“Your skin always looks so soft, I have to hold myself back from touching you,” Yeonjun does his best not to gasp, Beomgyu’s hand running along his inner thigh, he makes a shape that feels a lot like a heart. “Your thighs particularly, look like they’d be so nice to touch.”

The touch is a little too intimate, a little too full of promises. Yeonjun can’t hold back anymore, a small noise leaving him as Beomgyu wraps his hand around his thigh and squeezes. 

“Sound pretty,” Beomgyu’s words were mumbled, eyes focused on Yeonjun’s lips, they were close, centimeters apart. His eyes half closed, anticipating. “It's late, we should go to bed.”

Beomgyu moved, pressing face against Yeonjun’s shoulder. He was reeling, but Beomgyu’s touches had turned more comforting, lulling him to sleep. 

It was warm, maybe a little too warm. But he liked it, maybe a little too much. Tangled together.

**Author's Note:**

> this is super overdramatic but its yeonjun centric so i'm gonna say its on purpose. i've been in a hella soft mood today and really enjoyed coming back to this series, i hope to visit them again in the future. 
> 
> as always i love comments, please leave them, i adore talking to you guys


End file.
